She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
