but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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