so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
