i need an iv and a liver transplant
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
