She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
