I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Let's get the cat blown out
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize
