he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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