my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
