how can u be prego again
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
