You're so nebulous sometimes
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
