You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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