what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
