We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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