I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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