I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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