And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
