We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
