i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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