6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
you inspire me to be a worse person
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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