I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
