just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
