So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
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