he wants to bone in the snuggie
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
