I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
operation have a gay friend backfired
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
