Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
