Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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