just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
