You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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