is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
