There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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