he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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