Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize
