okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize