This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
love makes seman taste better
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
