Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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