those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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