how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
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