i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize