You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
