paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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