no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
