this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
