Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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