i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
