belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
