Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
