fuck your aforementioned shoe
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
