You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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