Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
