She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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