I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
